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Golden Grinders/Transcript
The episode opens on a bird eye view of Sprawl City. The camera then slowly pans down to The Lot, revealing the Wild Grinders' silhouettes. The scene cuts to Lil Rob Lil Rob: WILD GRINDEEEEERRRS!! The scene zooms in to the other members, and all start to skate down to the Lot. We start with Lil Rob crouching down to perform a trick, heading to a wooden ramp in enjoyment. His name banner pops up: red words with a blue border in weak cursives; the color theme of his skateboard with hexagons and an alien face is paint splattered. Emo Crys, a boy with dark colors, grinds on a rail. Then, his name banner appears as a bright purple, eerie font, with his color scheme splatter, consisting of a flock of crows and a hill. Jay Jay is an African-American boy who is grinding on a couch with a rail. His name appears as a yellow, squared font (something that is used for sports jerseys). It has a green border and green paint with diamonds thrown in. Spitball is present grinding a rail from stairways. His banner is a sharp, black set of words, as the crossbones skull and the "kampai" background with a hint of blue hits it. Jack Knife, gleefully lifting his body with his right hand on a ramp, has his banner as an urban, but techno font in red and dark blue. The yellow paint reveals the hint of his skateboard. Jack makes a goofy expression, as the lens of a video camera transitions. Goggles, the Grinders' cameraman, stands to film. His banner is a blue, cartoonish font with a green border, while the background with square patterns is splattered. Meaty, Lil Rob pet bulldog, appears last, with his name on bones and magenta paint splattered. The next scene cuts to a limousine on the street. Lil Rob is distracted. Lil Rob: Check it out! All but Lil Rob crash into one another, and begin to fall. Lil Rob lands, before seeing his friends fall and scoots in avoidance. All but Rob: WOOAAH!! (thud), (cat screeches) A close-up of Lil Rob is here. (DING) Lil Rob: 'Cause where's there a limo, there is always opportunity. (to Meaty) Meaty. Meaty stops licking and pants. Lil Rob: Do what you do, young puppy. Meaty runs outside from the Lot to a pipe, the limousine halts, and he whimpers. Jack Knife: Why is it crystal long, man? Is it a giraffe driving it? Lil Rob: A giraffe? Come on, man, that's a limousine. Emo Crys: Oh that's right, Jack Knife...A giraffe is driving a car. Jack Knife: W-well, um, I-I dunno, man. Jay Jay: Hey, hey, yo, go easy on Jack Knife. Jack Knife: Ha, ha, thanks, homie! (small splat splat) (alarm rings) Jay Jay: AAH!! Don't touch me with you dirty, germy fingers! Oh! Oh-ahagh! Ahem! Why are you filming me? Goggles: I find your germaphobic personality fascinating. Jay Jay: Come on, man! Lil Rob: We need a closer look. Jay Jay: Yo that's Chad and Ashalina! I can't believe it! A crowd of camera people take pictures of Chad and Ashlina, a rich couple, holding crying babies. Meaty howls, pretending to be dead, catching the attention to them. Ashelina: Is the doggie okay? Meaty blinks. The couple turns to the place. Ashelina: Oh. Look at this fabulously, resourceful, inner-city art. Chad: Slum children are so creative. Ashelina: So urban. I love it. Jay Jay: Hey! (record scratches) Jay Jay: Who she calling slum children? Jack Knife: U-Us? Jay Jay: I was being rhetorical. Jack Knife: Y-you were being who? Babies cry loudly, as the scene pans to the right to an ugly baby. Ugly Baby: (Low voice) Goo. (ding) Lil Rob: Wild Grinders, I think we may have found ourselves a sponsor. The Grinders huddle into a circle. Spitball: ¿Qué? ¿Dónde? (What? Where?) Jack Knife: E-excuse me? Lil Rob: Look, you guys have to trust me on this. Look pathetic, sad, and hopeless. Jay Jay: So Emo Crys, just do you? Emo Crys: Oh how dare you? Lil Rob: (whispering) Everybody, shut up and act pathetic! Sad orchestral music plays; Lil Rob walks towards Chad and Ashalina with a moped expression. Lil Rob: (pretending to be sad) Hello, m'am. Sir. Ashelina: Oh my god! Spitball is licking dirt and Emo Crys cries. The scene pans to Jack Knife with dinner utensils and a plate, and Meaty tied on a pole, while Jay Jay stands here. Ashelina: Chad, babe. Look at the little orphan babies. Chad: Love, but...we have to adopt them. Ashelina: Immediately. A butler walks to the Grinders. Butler: You're all hereby and forthwith adopted by Ashalina and Chad. Ashelina: All right, let's give them a nanny or something, and could somebody take these babies I'm holding? I'm getting infant all over me. The Grinders look at the forms. Jay Jay: Hey, Rob. We can't be adopted. We have parents. Lil Rob: Parents, Jay Jay? Really, we're talkin' about parents, right now? I mean look at our boards! The Grinders' boards are torn and broken, as flies buzz around them. Lil Rob: Jack Knife, are those even wheels? Jack Knife: Maybe. Lil Rob: And is that a bagel? Jack Knife: Y-yeah. Maybe. Lil Rob: Look guys. We are Wild Grinders. Okay, and right now, we are Junkie Grinders, 'cause all our equipment is horrible. How are we suppose to get spots with bad equipment? We need this! We're gonna have the best equipment, the best clothes, we're talkin' the best of everything! Jay Jay: Then what? Lil Rob: Then we are S.F.L. Jay Jay: S.F.L.? Lil Rob: Superstars For Life. A camera flash transitions the next scene with a news report. Reporter: I'm broadcasting live from deep inside one of Sprawl City's poorest areas, where Sprawlywood megastars Ashlina and Chad just adopted 6 street urchins. (To Lil Rob) How do you feel now that you've been rescued from the streets by your new fabulously famous parents? Lil Rob: Oh, it just feels so incredible, you know. We-we live in this old life for so, so many years. I mean, we eat mostly rocks. I just can believe the heavens have opened up and drop Chad and Ashelina down to save us. Cuts to Rob's parents at the living room. Gene: Mmmyello, is that our son? Patty: Robert! Lil Rob: If you are looking for me, you should know my new adopted name is Urban Baby Number 1. I'd just stopped by to pick up a few things, and FYI, I am moving in with Chad and Ashelina. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a rendezvous with Urban Babies Numbers 2 through 6. Later! Gene: You'll be home by 7 or you'll never skate again. Lil Rob slams the door. From the Dyrdek house, we go to the next scene to the Lot, where a crowd huddle to the Grinders, but Rob and Emo Crys. Lil Rob: What's up, Emo Crys? Emo Crys: We have sold out. There's no use living, really. (holds his board) Break my board! Just break my board and leave me for dead! Lil Rob: Look, I'm just sayin'. We've been tryin' to get sponsored for our entire skateboarding lives. Who needs a sponsor when you got Chad and Ashelina? Emo Crys: Money changes everything. Delivery Man: I have a suitcase full of money for an Urban Baby Number 4. Emo Crys: Yeah, that's me! Where do I sign? (ding) Lil Rob walks, but bumps into the butler. Butler: Your mother and father couldn't be here, but they say hello, and they send this hug. (tries to hug) No it's okay, just look at--now, come here. (hugs) Lil Rob: Let's not get awkward. Butler: (clears throat) Ashelina and Chad also sent another wonderful gift to commemorate this occasion. A truck beeps it's horn and shows a load of golden skateboards. A golden construction begins. Golden beams of sparkles play their transitioning roles to view the Grinders in their golden clothes. A close-up of Jay Jay's golden board appears. Jay Jay: I'm skatin' on solid gold! Jay Jay joyfully continues skating. Spitball: ¡Me llaman el conquistador! (They call me the conquistador!) Lil Rob: WE'RE THE GOLDEN GRINDEEEEERRRS!! Lil Rob sings We Did It. A montage of the Grinders travelling around the world starts. At the end, the butler's cell phone rings, before answering it. Butler: Mm-hmm. Oh yes, I understand. The Grinders skate while the crowd shutters their cameras. Jack Knife: Yeah-heh-heah! Emo Crys: Ow-ooh! Butler: May I have your attention, please? Ashelina and Chad are breaking up. I'm afraid our business here is done. The crowd moves away. Construction Worker: All right, boys! Let's get this stuff outta here! The workers snatch the Grinders' new boards, causing them to fall on the ground. All: Woah! Ugh! Jack Knife: What is it all mean, Little Rob? Butler: I'm afraid it means goodbye. Of course, I'll need these boards and any boxes of cash you've received. Emo Crys: NO!!! NOT THE MONEY!! The workers' snatches the case of money from Emo Crys. Emo Crys: (whining) It's my new favorite thing! The limousine zips away, with the document floating to the Lot. Jay Jay: Yo. This place is even worse than before! Jack Knife: And where is all of our old skate stuff? The Grinders' old equipment was dumped by a truck to the Lot. Emo Crys: There it is. A sad stack of broken dreams. Lil Rob: Come on, man! Who cares about being Golden Grinders? We're Wild Grinders! And let's be real, we've just skated on the moon. (beat in a second) Hold up, where's Meaty? Meaty, singingly woofing We Did It, as the instrumental version plays, floats on the moon. He ends the episode with a howl, and the setting of Sprawl City's Lot lightens up. Category:Transcripts